A blog where families who love and live the Catholic Faith can share, encourage and support each other.

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

When You Just Want to Run and Hide

Sometimes life just gets too hard and we want to run and hide from the world.  But we can’t.  We have little people depending on us for their every need and we simply need to mother them, even if all we want is for someone to mother us.  So, how do we keep going?
  • Go to another room, shut the door and take a deep breath (any room is fine, even the toilet, as long as you are on your own).  Say a prayer, asking the Holy Spirit to guide you in all you do today.  Try to remember that God is in control of your day, and He trusts that you can do what He has planned for you to do.  Even though there may still be chaos outside, you can leave the room and face it, knowing you are doing so with the help of God.
  • Be patient with yourself and remember that this is just a season.  These times happen to everyone and sometimes it is just a matter of getting through it, especially if you are the mother of very young children.  My baby just turned one, and I realised I have just gotten out of my ‘baby funk’.  In the last couple of weeks, I  have realised that I am much more willing to go out and do things, whereas before I just wanted to stay home and be a hermit.  I just had to accept that this too, would pass.
  • Change it up a bit.  One morning the children were going a bit wild, and I was at my wits end.  It had been a horrible morning, and I needed to get the baby to sleep.  So I asked them to build a big tent from chairs and sheets while I was getting him to sleep and we would have a little picnic. He didn’t sleep for long anyway, but it was long enough for us all to reconnect and have a fun little picnic (which really only included crackers and chips because I like to do it the easy way J)
  • Keep your eyes on Jesus.  Pray whenever it comes to mind.  Thank Him for everything – as soon as you notice a blessing in your life, give God thanks. And remember to thank Him for this hard time in your life – you are growing through it, even if it doesn’t seem like it now.  Ask the Holy Spirit for help.  He won’t let you down.  Jesus promised the Holy Spirit would be our helper, and he truly is.  Sometimes my brain is in such a fog and I can’t for the life of me think of what to cook for dinner at night because of our many food restrictions.  I will usually pray about it, and would you believe, I always get an answer.  Ask Him to help you with all your needs, even the seemingly insignificant.
  • Bundle the children up and go for a walk.  Although may take a lot of time and effort to prepare for the walk, the results are worth it.  I am allergic ;) to exercise, and will try my best to avoid it, but I have decided it is time to make it part of our weekly routine.  It takes about an hour to prepare and about 20 minutes to walk to the park with several attempts at getting the children to walk in a group, but when we get to the park it is fun.  We kick a ball, swing, run around and just get rid of that extra energy (well, the children get rid of it – I somehow gain it).
  • Make a cuppa and sit outside.  Put the baby in the swing, and just watch your children having fun.  Enjoy their silly antics.  Laugh with them.  Live in the moment.  Relax.  This will brighten your spirits.
  • Do you have a favourite candle or aromatherapy fragrance?  My favourite candle is Dusk’s ‘Harmony’.  I will often light one of these in the kitchen whilst I am cooking dinner.  It just helps to gently calm me.  Whatever aromatherapy mix you use, try to include lavender too – it helps to calm everybody.  If you use aromatherapy oils, please make sure you only use pure oils, not ‘fragrances’.  Fragrances are too synthetic and are more likely to cause headaches and grumpiness (this goes for scented candles too).
  • Bach Rescue Remedy, or Brauer Calm (available from Health food shops and chemists) are helpful if you are feeling edgy and grumpy.  A Beroccawill give you energy if the thought of one more thing to do makes you cry. When I was pregnant with Jack, the thought of making dinner each night would have me in tears, so I would take a Berocca in the afternoon and it would give me that extra boost I needed to get me through the next few hours.
  • Play some music – either something calming to help you relax a bit, or upbeat that begs you to dance or sing loudly, or just be plain silly - for this you might need Colin Buchanan or Veggie Tales.  Here's one on YouTube to get you started.
  • Have something to look forward to, and put it on the calendar.  I usually get movie tickets for Christmas from my hubby as he knows that one of my favourite things to do is to go and watch a movie on my own.  There is no one I need to talk to (and hardly anyone else in our quiet cinema either) and I can just be transported for a couple of hours.  Or plan a special night for you and your husband.  We always look forward to our date nights. Sometimes just having something planned to look forward to can help you get through the tough times now.
  • Put a movie on for the children while the baby is sleeping.  Sit down and relax in another room for as long as they let you.  And don't feel guilty.
  • If all else fails, HIDE!  Ring your mum or an understanding friend and ask them to come and look after your children for half an hour while you lock yourself in a room and refocus.  For Mother’s Day I encouraged Rose to make me some vouchers to help look after the littlies instead of spending money on a gift.  I cashed in one of these vouchers the other day when Ireally needed some space.
    Please visit Natalie at Trusting God Each Day


  1. WELCOME TO THE BLOG - www.virgemdeguadalupe.blogspot.com

  2. Oh my goodness! I love your tips! I can see you have lots of experience. My favorite is..."If all else fails, Hide!" My hiding spot is the bathtub. My youngest is 6 though. I know you can't lock yourself in the bathroom when you have little ones. I enjoyed your post.